Not even in my wildest dreams, did I think that I would ever have to write a tribute for my younger brother Lakshman, ‘Lucky’ to most of his friends. I could not bring myself to start on this till now as it’s extremely painful. The memories come flashing back from the years gone by. I can’t remember my life without Malli since we were just one and a half years apart. So, all my living memories are full of him.
He was born in Kurunegala and his schooling career was mostly at the St. Annes’ College and Maliyadeva College. However, his association with the St. Annes College was closer to his heart, probably as my father was also an old boy of that school. Malli was a long standing and an active member of the Old Boys’ Association of St. Anne’s College and held various positions on the board of the OBA and was the President for some time.
He graduated from the Ceylon Hotel School in the late 70s and up to his demise, he kept up his close links with his hotel school mates not only in Sri Lanka but also overseas. Despite having a large network of friends, relatives, colleagues, and associates, he also had a unique ability of keeping up those strong bonds throughout his life even extending up to the next generation.
To all our consternation, his passion was politics. Even as a child he tried to canvass K.B. Ratnayake’s vote for the UNP in early 60’s. He used to write to all politicians starting from Dudley Senanayake and J.R. Jayewardene even though my father who was a Government official could not engage in politics. During the school days, I was his secretary as my handwriting was better than his. He engaged in politics since the early 70s joining the Samawadhi Shishya Peramuna and our Kurunegala home became a political hub for the UNP with regular visits by Rukman Senananayke, Gamini Dissanayake and Ranil Wickremesinghe among others and all the politicians in the area. I believe my father despite his vociferous arguments would have admired Malli’s steadfast commitment to politics secretly.
Loyalty and commitment
Malli was let down by many of his political associates throughout his life, but he never wavered from his loyalty and commitment and passion. He changed his alliances couple of times ending up with Mahinda Rajapaksa and his two siblings for over three decades.
Malli always enjoyed campaigning for elections more than the victory and had confided in his daughters that his one ambition was to support and campaign for a winning presidential candidate which he achieved not once but several times last being the 2019 election. I still hear his jubilant voice giving us the news with the enthusiasm of a schoolboy.
He worked in various ministries overtime, but I think his most enjoyable and rewarding positions were at the Ministry of Mahaweli Development and more recently Defence Ministry as the Director General of the Defence Media Unit. He was proud to have announced the capture of Mavil Aru and also the final victory of the battle.
His knowledge was thorough on varied subjects and his retention power of facts and figures was amazing. During the latter part of his life, I realised that he was well read and if he had actually applied himself when young, he would have achieved academic excellence without any doubt. He could rattle off the election statistics, cricket scores and defence news by memory.
His association with the greatest in the land, made him an interesting conversationalist and his political anecdotes were interesting, amusing, and insightful. It’s so unfortunate he did not write his memoires extensively and if not for his untimely death he would have done so.
He was loyal to his superiors throughout his life and would never share highly confidential personal information about them with even his closest family though we probed all the time.
He hardly used his connections to further his personal life. He never tried to obtain foreign scholarships for his offspring or access President’s Fund for medical treatment for himself. His response to our inquiry was that there were more deserving people who could not afford to educate their children or seek medical treatment overseas but he could manage with his own resources.
He always preferred to be treated by Sri Lankan medical professionals and trusted them and I wonder now whether it was a wise move. His failing in life was putting his work ahead of his own health. If not, he probably would have lived up to his 90s like my father which he never wanted.
He was always the centre of attraction and was one of the most sociable and resourceful child in the family circle. He was good looking, dark, tall, and handsome even from his early teens. He had wide-ranging interests; politics, music, literature, religion, and history. He was also generous to a fault as several confided at the funeral that he had offered them financial help when they needed. He would use his extensive network to help others from all walks of life but would not divulge it to others.
Naughtiest siblings
He was one of the naughtiest siblings one could wish for. I was the most obedient and law abiding child but he would make me climb trees and participate in his pranks. I was his unwilling partner in crime in childhood. When he first drove Amma and me to Kandy, we got caught in a traffic jam up an incline and somehow he took us to safety. He never would give up when in a crisis.
He was a high-risk high-reward person while I played safe all the time. He always thought I could take care of myself not realising the fact that being his only sister gave me so much protection world over wherever I travel by being “Lakshman’s Sister”.
All through my Peradeniya days he would visit me during weekends or accompany me back and forth to Kurunegala without any qualms. When I was to embark on my first overseas trip to India, he advised me; “Don’t always think someone will mug you on the way. Learn to trust people.” I never heeded his advice but always remembered that on my numerous travels.
He was witty, fun loving and daring. The day there was an air raid in Colombo by the LTTE when we heard the news of a LTTE plane heading to Colombo called Malli to find out where he was. He just said, “We are on a ship and the plane is heading towards the Port.” The line went dead and for hours we had no news of his whereabouts. The following day we had an Alms Giving and after a Media Conference, he walked in nonchalantly as a hero. He was extremely meticulous in organisation of events and campaigns whether it was an election, state function, family get-together or an Alms Giving. He was a born administrator.
Despite all his patriotic sentiments, his favorite cricket team was the Australian Team. He was a cricket fan and was fortunate to work with Gamini Dissanayake (GD) which provided ample opportunity for him to mingle with national and international cricketers.
He worked on the personal staff of Gamini Dissanayake and GD was his mentor and during the Golden Era of the Mahaweli Scheme, he worked with GD. He respected and admired him so much and it’s ironic that his last article in a newspaper was a tribute to Gamini Dissanayake in March this year. When I commended him on the article, he asked me to keep the newspaper for him to collect when he returned from Sydney, but it was never to be.
Malli had the great fortune to work with many leaders of the country. He had an eternal positive attitude. Therefore, he always took challenges in life and he accepted any task that was entrusted to him without hesitation and did it excellently. Probably, he had the patience to wait for his turn, especially in his mature years. He had a very forgiving nature. He always saw a silver lining in every dark cloud and had a generous heart to forgive those who wronged him.
He loved music and at a very young age, he organised musical shows in Kurunegala and became a close friend of Milton Mallawarachchi and Clarance Wijewardane and had a close friendship till their demise. In recent times when he was in Sydney as the Consul General, he would pay tribute to his two close friends with regular posts on his Facebook Account.
He was an animal lover long before animal activists emerged in the country. He would always have dogs, cats, fish, and couple of times had monkeys as his pets and would feed them from the table whenever he got a chance. Malli was very compassionate and if he saw any injured or dead animal on the road, he would stop the car to attend to it or get it buried. Malli and my nieces treat their pets as family members and he never failed to bring them food on return from his numerous overseas travels and to have video calls with them.
Despite a relatively short life, he had a full life and was content with his achievements. He enjoyed his last post as Consul General for Sri Lanka in Sydney. He had a wide circle of friends there and for him to breathe his last in a country he loved would have made him happy.
He loved his three daughters and doted on them and he immensely enjoyed being a grandfather. The little ones still call out Aththa as soon as they spot his pictures. I wish his daughters and the two grandchildren had his company much longer rather than compelled to live with the past memories from now on.
Multi-faceted personality
It is difficult to capture the essence of a sibling who was a multi-faceted personality and was part of my life for 66 years. Amma and I realise that when we went to the temple after his passing away, we had only prayed for his health, safety, and prosperity.
I never stopped worrying about him as the older sister and felt responsible for him but now I feel a huge vacuum in my heart. The fact that he was somewhere where I can reach him by phone made me feel safe and protected. After Malli left us, when I pray there is nothing for me to wish for except that we be united soon in this Journey of Sansara.
Malli, may you never meet with an untimely death and may we all meet again and again in life’s journey till all of us attain the supreme bliss of nibbana! Akka